[Cecelia's hands grip tighter as she quells a hot surge of fearful anger. she likes to imagine much more fanciful feats of his sort of wizardry, but the truth is his work is invisible, and that makes it more insidious to her.
carefully:] Can you still feel his hand? Even this far away?
[flatly, with a note of derision:] I very much wonder about that.
[she huffs through her nose, closing her eyes; it's easier to keep from running her mouth if she's not looking at him.
even so, she lifts her chin haughtily:] I wouldn't discredit one's instincts or conscience so quickly simply because someone has done you a favor or three, but that's hardly my business, now is it?
[Frustration tears at his senses and he begins running a hand through his damp and disheveled hair; a move she might remember from long ago. Whenever he was anxious or unsure, his hand always found its way to combing through those blue locks.]
...Ce...
Lady Ardenbury...
...I...feel as though I owe you an apology.
[He struggles with the words. Not because they're painful to say or there's no truth to them. It's because natures are conflicting inside of him. He's losing a sense of self. That fire is trying to flare up but the air keeps being sucked away.]
I've caused you no end of trouble and here you are...giving me shelter. I'm...I'm sorry for always interfering in the privacy of your Vale...
Are you apologizing for yourself or the man who orders you here?
[there's a bitter bite to her words, quiet though they are. apologizing for himself...or his master...does it even matter to him which one it is? gods, this is infuriating; she'd love to torch the Skywalker would it do much good, but...dominoes. she can't. she's learned.
such stakes care not for the things she cares most for, after all.]
I know I'm not always right but...I do want to protect the peace as much as I can. And...that means this place too, for what it's worth.
[He looks around, actually taking in his surroundings...and his gaze falls to her, kneeling next to him. It lingers, watching as the fire catches her curls, lighting them up.]
[He catches himself staring and abruptly turns his gaze back to the fire.]
...Can I...Can I ask you something? A bit personal?
[her eyes were down on her hands, running her thumb along a scaly knuckle. the movement of his shadow catches her peripheral vision and brings her attention up at the question.]
You may. Whether or not I answer is another thing entirely, of course.
...Why did you let me in here? I mean...we have a bit of a history of...[Fireworks? No that implies something...well, she did kiss him last time...]
[And as much as he wants to make the joke, he doesn't want to be ejected from this haven this very moment.]
...Loud disagreements. You had no reason to let me in here...in fact, you could correctly think that this might be some ploy or...or trap. But...you let me in...
Sometimes you act like you know more about me than I know about myself...
[they sit right in front of the hearth, but Cecelia suddenly feels so very cold.
her eyes stay fixed on the flames, her element, even as her expression grows more withdrawn.
after a minute or so:]
I knew you once. A very long time ago. You were someone very dear to me.
[when she blinks again, she does feel tears and huffs gently, unlacing her fingers and gently dabs them away. stupid.
briskly, shaking her head:] But that doesn't apply here in this realm. No one else remembers that time, so I've concluded this one is a kind of...splinter or alter.
So it's technically not that I know you, but I know a you.
[she turns her head so she can't even see him in her peripheral, her voice cracking a bit in places, dictating the level of volume she can speak.]
Certainly. There are many, many variables. The notion is quite boggling, frankly, and I lack the proper dowsing tools to confirm one way or another, so anything I say beyond that is pure speculation.
[she doesn't answer, just sitting as still as she can possibly manage, the only giveaway that she's not turned to stone is an occasional quiet gulp so she can recompose and force the impassiveness of her expression.]
[with a vague scoff in her voice:] Why, indeed. I could write novels on that for all the good it does.
[she shakes her head, looking back over, fresh tracks for tears streaking her cheeks, unchecked, even as she keeps her stoic countenance. eyes betray everything, though.]
Darin, telling you those sorts of things will add nothing but burden to you. Do you think I wish to do that?
[his laugh makes her ears burn and her pulse quicken again. despite everything, despite her mindful efforts to be above her feelings, she sure as hell is in them.
she kind of deserves it, considering the hubris she had in bringing him in here.
she keeps her head turned as she listens to him, unmoving.
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carefully:] Can you still feel his hand? Even this far away?
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...I've never stood in defiance of Lord Sywalker before. The man's done so much for me and...and I know that what I'm doing is good...
[He wants to believe it's good. He needs to. If he doesn't, he'll unmake himself in an instant.]
I'm...just doing my best. If I failed Master Skywalker in any way, I deserved being put down the way I was.
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[she huffs through her nose, closing her eyes; it's easier to keep from running her mouth if she's not looking at him.
even so, she lifts her chin haughtily:] I wouldn't discredit one's instincts or conscience so quickly simply because someone has done you a favor or three, but that's hardly my business, now is it?
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...Ce...
Lady Ardenbury...
...I...feel as though I owe you an apology.
[He struggles with the words. Not because they're painful to say or there's no truth to them. It's because natures are conflicting inside of him. He's losing a sense of self. That fire is trying to flare up but the air keeps being sucked away.]
I've caused you no end of trouble and here you are...giving me shelter. I'm...I'm sorry for always interfering in the privacy of your Vale...
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[there's a bitter bite to her words, quiet though they are. apologizing for himself...or his master...does it even matter to him which one it is? gods, this is infuriating; she'd love to torch the Skywalker would it do much good, but...dominoes. she can't. she's learned.
such stakes care not for the things she cares most for, after all.]
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I know I'm disruptive but...I actually have a little fun here. And as safe as the Empire has been made to be, it's sorely lacking in fun.
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a dry-sounding hmph.] So which part are you apologizing for, then?
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[her mouth tugs slightly, briefly. some things don't change.]
It's been heard, then. Perhaps that's some solace for you, since you've other things to be concerned with.
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I know I'm not always right but...I do want to protect the peace as much as I can. And...that means this place too, for what it's worth.
[He looks around, actually taking in his surroundings...and his gaze falls to her, kneeling next to him. It lingers, watching as the fire catches her curls, lighting them up.]
[He catches himself staring and abruptly turns his gaze back to the fire.]
...Can I...Can I ask you something? A bit personal?
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You may. Whether or not I answer is another thing entirely, of course.
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But...I guess I want to know...
...Why did you let me in here? I mean...we have a bit of a history of...[Fireworks? No that implies something...well, she did kiss him last time...]
[And as much as he wants to make the joke, he doesn't want to be ejected from this haven this very moment.]
...Loud disagreements. You had no reason to let me in here...in fact, you could correctly think that this might be some ploy or...or trap. But...you let me in...
Sometimes you act like you know more about me than I know about myself...
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her eyes stay fixed on the flames, her element, even as her expression grows more withdrawn.
after a minute or so:]
I knew you once. A very long time ago. You were someone very dear to me.
[when she blinks again, she does feel tears and huffs gently, unlacing her fingers and gently dabs them away. stupid.
briskly, shaking her head:] But that doesn't apply here in this realm. No one else remembers that time, so I've concluded this one is a kind of...splinter or alter.
So it's technically not that I know you, but I know a you.
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[He pivots her way as he attempts to process what she's saying.]
You're saying there's multiple versions of 'me' out there? Infinite Darin Altways?
[Did the universe just shudder?]
[Regardless, he plows forward.]
But...how do you know that the me you knew and I are the same? I mean...there's gotta be differences, right?
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Certainly. There are many, many variables. The notion is quite boggling, frankly, and I lack the proper dowsing tools to confirm one way or another, so anything I say beyond that is pure speculation.
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...[How dear?] What happened to that version of me?
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[she doesn't answer, just sitting as still as she can possibly manage, the only giveaway that she's not turned to stone is an occasional quiet gulp so she can recompose and force the impassiveness of her expression.]
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He uh...He didn't make it, did he...
[He rubs the back of his head awkwardly.]
I guess that explains some things, though. Like why I feel so comfortable around you.
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He was alive. Last I saw him. Alive, fine.
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[she shakes her head, looking back over, fresh tracks for tears streaking her cheeks, unchecked, even as she keeps her stoic countenance. eyes betray everything, though.]
Darin, telling you those sorts of things will add nothing but burden to you. Do you think I wish to do that?
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[He offers a lopsided smile.]
Seriously...you should open up more. Loosen up.
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You never change.
[it's both wonderful and terrible and she kind of wants to die.]
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[Before either of them realizes, he busts out laughing. It's a hearty, pleasant laugh; almost relieved.]
...Ah man, Lady Ardenbury, you have no idea how much I needed that.
If I never change that means nothing's different about me now. It means I'm not messed up or anything...!
Besides...I guess that just means I don't know how to be anyone else but me. So...thanks for reminding me of that...
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she kind of deserves it, considering the hubris she had in bringing him in here.
she keeps her head turned as she listens to him, unmoving.
quietly:] Of course.
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